Trusting in God

I'm learning....learning about Trust....learning about Trust in God. As a family, we've been through some trials, and through it all I've grown closer to God and after the last "trial" I've been doing a lot of self searching to find out what God is trying to teach me about trust.

When I recieved some not so great news yesterday about my health, the first thing that came to mind after I got into my car from my doctors appt was to trust in God and he will make things better. The verse from Proverbs came to mind, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understandings; in all ways acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight." While I thought in this instance, trust God, its not always that easy. It's hard to give completely control over to God sometimes. I sometimes just NEED to know what is going on so I can work on fixing it, but sometimes thats not the plan. I was never in control from the beginning, it was God all along. I truely believe that God is using these instances to teach me about Trust in HIM.

We have been through a lot as a family. We've been through a lot of what other people have, but had a little more than some people too (sick children, job loss more than once, medical issues which has required 4 surgeries in the last 3 years, major house problems, car problems, and the list goes on). Sometimes I feel our "luck" isn't very good and that often times we have a dark cloud thats following us. But I know God uses these trials and tough times for good. God never gives us more than we can handle and even sometimes thats a hard concept to put our hands around. I can openly admit, I have personally been through a lot and wonder what God is trying to teach us but we continue to worship God and are even closer to him today than we've ever been.

I have a story from yesterday that I would love to share with everyone. I was at a doctors appt yesterday and recieved some news I wasn't quite expecting to hear. I made calls to my husband and my sister to get all my feelings and emotions out and then had a little quiet time with God as I was on my way to the park. I prayed to God for everything to be okay and to hold me and my family close. I ended my prayer and took a deep breath and pulled myself back together and turned the radio on (I always have the radio pre-set to 98.5 KTIS, a Christian radio station up here), and the song was "I'll be an angel by your side" by Francesca Battistelli. I listened to the song and knew that was God speaking to me telling me that no matter what he's right by my side and that I needed to give it all to Him. This meant a lot to me to hear this and made me feel a little better. I had finished with my CT scan and as a family, we were heading to Tom's softball game. At this point, it was about 6pm and we hadn't heard results from the scan yet like we had been told. It was a real bummer because this was potenitally life changing news. Tom and I kind of stewed about it in the car and our conversation came to a hault and Tom reached over to turn on the radio for the rest of our drive and on the radio was the song. "While I'm Waiting". It was God teaching us to trust again. It was God teaching us that even through the waiting, He's in control and we can trust that He's there for us.

Tom and I have grown so close to God over the years. We've used times of trial for good. Even though we don't know it at the time, we have always looked back on all our trials and thought, wow - God is good isn't he?! Not knowing what God's plans are is a hard concept to grasp but we can know with God in control, everything will be just fine, we just have to TRUST.